Ahh Babies! Just the thought of babies brings people to a very happy place. In fact, you can’t even say “baby” and not smile. Who doesn’t love those big eyes, soft skin, the way babies suck their lips in their sleep as if they’re nursing or the warm fuzzy feeling you get inside when a baby makes eye contact and smiles at you. Don’t deny it- you get fuzzy. *Me? You think I’m cool! Well yes tiny human I agree! *puffs chest. Babies just smell of fresh linen soft clouds and oxytocin. So tiny and new to endless possibilities.
… and someone had to bring them into this world. Emotions shift for most people at this point.
“OMG NO, I couldn’t”
“I’m scheduling my C-Section, I’m not pushing, that’s crazy”
“WHAT! I’m getting Epidural ASAP, and keeping my hand on the trigger!”
All things I have heard so often by new and even existing mothers. Why? What’s the big scare? In a world where women are more empowered than ever before… the amount of women genuinely afraid of Labor is astronomical.
NOW … before I get started let me stop here and say this: I KNOW plenty of women who do not have a choice in the matter. I know there are women who had their lives put at risk in the labor process, thank God for modern medicine. I know and understand there are circumstances where a natural birth just isn’t the right choice for the family. And ultimately, you are a mother either way, natural, C-section, epidural, back seat of a taxi cab.. whatever. You bring life to this world and care for your infant – you are a mother and I commend you because we moms make this stuff look easy. Being a mother is not for the faint of heart. What I want to do is address the attitude towards labor and delivery.
I had my daughter at a young age of 21. I personally have always wanted to be a young mom. I know the trend lately is to wait a little longer to have babies, but personally, there’s nothing more I wanted in life than to have my own child at a young age (not too young)– Perhaps I will discuss my reasoning another day. When I became pregnant I told my husband by putting a “bun in the oven” and her due date with my pregnancy test (Which he thought was a thermometer at first). Super Cute.
I did what I was “supposed” to do… made an appointment with my OBGYN, had an ultrasound, pulled down my pants, scheduled a day to be induced, went to the hospital, waited until I couldn’t handle the pain anymore, requested epidural, had a healthy baby.
Having my princess, Keilani, seemed like a walk in the park compared to the horror stories I have heard in the past. Everything went according to plan. We were out of the hospital December 31st, just in time to spend the first day of the New Year at home. Perfect, right? So when I became pregnant with my son 4 years later… why was I still searching for something different? If it isn’t broke don’t fix it, right?
I’m so grateful to have run into my husband’s cousin who told me to watch “The business of being Born”. That very night, I found it on NetFlix and my life was forever changed. I was around 4 months pregnant at the time. It’s crazy how much your perspective changes when you simply educate yourself. I won’t go into detail about the facts and what drove my decision – just know that at that moment I KNEW having a natural home birth was right for me. THIS is what I was missing. THIS is how it SHOULD be and THIS felt right in my heart.
I switched from my OBGYN to a Midwife, and never looked back. Best decision I made the entire pregnancy. The appointments were SO much more than just, pull your pants down, how much do you weigh? Ok see you next month/week. Each appointment I would spend a good 45 minutes with my midwife, and I would learn. Not only about the baby that was growing inside me, but the changes happening to me. I felt like a first time mom all over again! There was SO much I didn’t know about myself it was incredible.
For instance: Round Ligament. Ask me what that was prior to baby #2 and I would have given you a blank stare. But these round ligaments surround and support your womb. As your tummy grows, the round ligament stretches like a rubber band. Too much movement or not enough water throughout my pregnancy really irritated me, and forced me to slow down. Had I not been aware, I’m sure I would have taken a trip to the hospital thinking something was seriously wrong with me. Being educated truly saved me (LOTS of) money and time.
Labor with Kaleb from the time my water broke to the time I gave birth was 19 hours. But really, my active labor was only 4 hours long. You can read about my whole home birth story here. After giving birth at home, I felt like laughing and crying — just over the moon with emotions. Not only did I finally have my baby boy here, but I did it. On my own. There was NOTHING I couldn’t do after that. I learned that the only thing holding you back from doing EXACTLY what it is you want to do is your own mindset. Free yourself, you’ve got the key.